Trauma

How do you know you’ve found the right person?  The test is when to have trauma in your life.  A death, sickness, job loss etc.

Anyone can say they love you when everything is easy.  When things get hard that is when you truly find out of that person loves you.

Why?  Because they need to think about whether they want to support you emotionally, mentally and physically.  That is where you see the true love.

if they stay and comfort you, lend a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on and arms to hold you then they do love you.  They  probably won’t be able to fix anything and will feel helpless but they will stay with you they it all.

Mark my words my friends trauma shows you who belongs in your life because they will stick by you or they will run away.

 

 

 

Wants

Everyday we are tryong to get that be house, a new car, jewelry, that trip etc.  we are so focused on things we want to buy.  Money is great to pay bills and buy us stuff but it doesn’t provide happiness.

Look at anyone rich and you will see that money may have given them financial freedom but it never provided the happiness they seek.  Stuff doesn’t bring happiness.  That is found in our relationship.  So when people don’t date someone due to the amount of money they make they are basically cutting out 90% of the population.

What they should be looking for is someone who fulfills them emotionally.  The money can be gained together from hard work.  I am not saying to date someone who refuses to work to pay their bills but if that person has a job and works hard it doesn’t matter what they make because they can grow with you.  They can grow with your support.

So think about that the next time you are complaining you can’t find that right person.  Are you basing your decision to date them on how much money they have?  I am not saying it will be easy but true love is worth that hard work.

 

 

Why me?

People ask this question everyday.  Especially in relationships where they have chosen people who disrespect them, are dishonest and whose actions basically tell them they don’t care about them.

People don’t realize that they have a pattern of how they choose people to be in their lives.  It stems from childhood experiences and adult experiences.  They grow accustomed to bad behavior and subconsciously seek it out.

We all have done this in our lives.  The only way out is to recognize that we have this pattern.  How?  At some point in our lives we become fed up with the way we are being treated.  We begin to look back on our lives and see that each person we were with was harmful in some way or abusive in some way.  Then and only then will we break the pattern of choosing toxic people.

So what do you want to avoid?  Disrespect, dishonesty, neglect, abuse emotionally or physically and lack of time and attention.  If you have anyone toxic in your life you need to remove them so you can be happier.

 

 

The past

Our past makes us who we are.  The good and the bad.  In relationships it shapes how we see our next significant other.

The bad experiences where we lost someone teach us not to trust anyone.  This hinders our goal of finding the right person because we think they are like our exes.

So how do you stop sabotaging your relationships?  Unfortunately the only way is to be completely vulnerable.  Know that there is someone who wants the same thing you do.  A loving, caring relationship.  You have to let them in knowing you can get hurt.  A double edged sword when all you want to do is avoid pain.

in relationships there will be some that cause you great pain, but those will be worth it when you find the right person.  So open up to your significant other and find that love, passion and relationship that you have been waiting for.

 

 

 

About me

I am an Italian American.  I grew up in a small town called New Castle in Pennsylvania.  I am forty six years old and

So why have I created a blog. For many months now I have been using Facebook as a medium to express my opinions on relationships.  I started doing that to help others but it also was helping me.

in doing so a friend of mine on Facebook was really touched by my words and she said I should start a chat group where I post my thoughts so here it is.

Each day I will make a post here for anyone who wants to read it.  If I can just help one person see the world differently then I will feel I’ve accomplished something.