Stability

The reason most people have anxiety is because they feel their lives are instantly.   They are always looking for life to be easier.

I hate  to be the bearer of bad news,  but life always presents challenges to us.  We want a nice,  neat package wrapped in a bow and what we get is a box half covered with gift wrap that has a hole in it.

The only way to get thru tough times is to cry a minute then find the humor in the situation and pick yourself up and go try again. It is no easy task but you have to keep moving forward.

People struggle  daily in poverty,  with disease,  with addiction,  etc.  Some struggles are just tougher than others.  So sometimes the things we see as struggles could be much worse.   Someone always has more challenges than you so remember that.

We have to find the good in our lives because their is good for each of us to hold on to.  Make that the focus in your mind and then go work in the issue at hand.   Be thankful for what you do have because their is always someone wishing  they had the things you do have in your life.

 

Uncomfortable

Life will kick you when you’re down.   It will make you feel like nothing will ever go right.

But in these moments if adversity where you feel you are being crushed by the weight of the world you should recognize that these moments are when you need to start growing.

They are opportunities for you to find ways to enhance your life for the better.  So what can we do to grow? Many things like going back for another degree,  taking a new career path,  changing your  or leading of people to help you grow etc.

But most of us hate feeling uncomfortable so we try to stop that feeling.   That uncomfortable feeling is what we need to grow.   It pushes us to find solutions.   It pushes us to be more.

So the next time you have this fling just sit with it for a minute.   Determine how you can use it to grow and then go make your life better.

 

 

Compromise

In a relationship  you will never find someone who likes everything you do.  So each of you will have to compromise to keep the relationship growing.

Say you like a certain show but your partner doesn’t but he watches it with you  anyway.  Then you reciprocate for a show he likes.   That’s compromise. This may seem like a small gesture,  but if you can compromise on the small things then it will be easier when the big issues come up.

Lime where to live or what jobs you should take or how many kids you will have etc.  If you aren’t willing to bend a little then your relationship won’t work. Each has of you will have to give up a little something to get bigger rewards later.

Some people may say this means you will always be unhappy because you’re not ding what you  want but I think they are misguided.  You will never like everything about anyone you choose to be with.  If anyone thinks there is someone who they will be happy with every aspect of their personality than they are delusional.

That’s not realistic.  You both will have to determine if what you don’t like is a deal breaker or if you can compromise on that issue.   Find a happy medium.   Love is about giving and receiving.   It’s not about taking and taking  until your partner is depleted.

 

Adored

Be with someone who adores you  to someone who ignores you.  I mean that they ignore you emotionally.

Say you tell them so etching they are doing upsets you and they say of I will change.   However,  what happens is they don’t change.  They just keeping doing the she hurtful thing.   That is what I mean when I say ignoring you emotionally.

They should be trying to change the behavior that hurt you.  If they are choosing to continue  that behavior then  it shows they don’t care about you.

Find someone who adores you enough to create the path with youfor a wonderfulicd together.

Confusion

No one should be wondering where their relationship is headed.  It should be clear pretty easy on.  Has your partner put you in their life?  I mean have they talked about the future, have you met their parents and siblings,  do they invite you to family functions?

If not this may be a good time for a conversation about the future. The answers you get will let you know where your headed.   If their is hesitation and excuses then your partner is on a different path than you. After a year of being together their should be a decision as to where the relationship is going.   If there isn’t than why would you keep investing time in something that continues to be uncertain?

We only live once and if the person you are with doesn’t want the same future as you do than you need to find the one who does.

Time and time again

We spend so much time dwelling on the past.  Going over and over the things we think we did wrong or how we could e done something differently.

Spending your time this way keeps you looking backwards.  It stops you from moving forwards and pursuing your dreams.

I think we dwell in the past sometimes just to beat ourselves up.  We haven’t forgiven ourselves for something.  Regrets are a waste of time.  I’m not saying we shouldn’t learn from mistakes but continuing to rehash them won’t change what happened.

So whatever you’re angry with yourself about just forgive yourself and move forward with your life.

Everyone makes mistakes. It just means you’re human. Move on and you will do bigger things in your life.

The Right Direction

People are always saying how their lives aren’t what they want them to be.  They want more money or more stuff.  They want someone to love them.  They want people to like them.

How do you know if your life is going in the right direction?  Ask yourself if your doing what you want or are you doing what others want you to do.  I think that money, love and friendships come from pursuing the things you want in life.  From being you.

If you are just content being you than the rest will follow.  I know people are working jobs just to keep up with bills, but there should be something in your life that you enjoy doing and you should be dong that in addition to working to pay bills.

Never doing anything you love will suck the spirit right out of you.  So yes you need to pay the bills but you also need to do things that make you happy.

So if you don’t know what you like to do than start figuring it out by doing new things.  Eventually you will find what makes you happy.

Superheroes

I think couples are like superheroes.  They fight villains to make the best relationship possible.

What villains?  Conflict, other people’s interference and getting too comfortable in a daily routine.

Conflict is in every relationship, but it’s how you handle it as a couple that matters.  You must have discussions about issues and come up with a plan for resolution.  Most couples fight to prove who is right.  There is no triply for being right.  It solves nothing  The best course of action is to avoid blame and just discuss how you both can fix the issue.  Seeking to be right only makes your partner want to avoid discussion on issues for fear onjust being berated for being wrong.

Other people can also be a source of problem in yourrelationships.  People interfere due to jealousy or they just don’t like your partner.  You will get unsolicited advice and even pressure to get out of your relationship to please someone else.  You are the only one who can decide what your life should be.  Don’t base it on someone else’s opinion.  You know your partner best and you know how you want the relationship to progress.  You have to decide what things are deal breakers and what things you can work on  with your partner.

Getting complacent in your relationships can also be a problem.  Most people get together and stop going on dates.  I think it’s a mistake.  You want to continue to learn about each other and have Fun together.  Working is necessary to pay bills, but it shouldn’t take over your lives.  You have to continue to do all those little things you did when you were dating to show you care.  Those little things make a huge difference.

So continue fighting the villins and make the best relationship you can.

 

 

Two faces

We spend our days at work with our work face on.  We put on the niceties and just get along to get through the day.

However,  we have a second face which is for our loved ones.  This is where we can be ourselves without judgment.  But if you are with someone who criticizes you for who you are or the things you like than you are in the wrong relationship.

The person you are with should love your personality, respect your opinions, love you flaws and accept you for who you are.

If you feel awkward or hindered by your partner than they are not the one for you.  You need to be able to be yourself in order for the relationship to last because otherwise you will be resentful.